Team Edward or Team Jacob? A New Moon guide for dudes, by a dude.

This weekend Twilight’s sequel ‘New Moon’ launched around the globe, with many movie theatres putting on midnight showings for the most  fanatical of followers of  Stephanie Meyer’s series of books, who just couldn’t wait ’till day time.

My wife is one of them. It was a late night for me…

With lots of screaming women…

Panting every time Robert Pattinson was on screen…

I’d known the film was coming for a while and knew what to expect. Most guys going along with their other half’s in the coming weeks might  not be as prepared. This is my guide, for dudes, to getting through the two and a quarter hours of film.

The Twilight Saga

‘New Moon’ is the second part of a four book series: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.

It will be much easier for you to get into ‘New Moon’ if you have first watched ‘Twilight’, but if you can’t, or can’t be bothered, this is what you need to know…

Bella (Kirsten Stewart) moves in with her dad after her mum hooks up with a baseball player…

It’s a pain for her moving to a new school at 17, but then she met Edward (Robert Pattinson), a 108 year old vampire passing as a 17 year old high school student (yep)…

At first Edward appears to be a total bastard to her , but turns out he’s just really attracted to her and doesn’t want to be. He and his family are ‘Vegetarians’ (They suck the blood of animals but don’t hurt humans), and hanging around with Bella is like teasing them with a really nice piece of sirloin steak.

So they hook up anyway, and then some other vampires show up causing trouble. It transpires that a cross human-vampire relationship is not without it’s problems either (imagine that) and so they have their own shit to sort out. But they work through it.

Edward V Jacob

New Moon centres around a love triangle between Edward, Bella and Jacob…

Jacob (Taylor Lautner) is the sixteen year old son of Bella’s father’s best friend.   A native American from the Quileute tribe who in ‘Twilight’ explained to Bella that the Cullen’s (Edwards Family) have an understanding with the tribe that allows them to stay in the area and that legend has it that the Quileutes are descendants from Wolves…

In ‘New Moon’ you find out it’s more than just a legend.

Jacob is very protective of Bella, and he know Edward is blood sucker. And Edward… he knows that Jacob is a vampire killing Werewolf, or at least he will be.

Sparks fly!

Team Edward or Team Jacob?

Polite Vampire or rugged Werewolf?

Lets run down the characters…

Edward: Extremely polite vampire; tall; chiseled jaw; dresses nice; speaks like a Victorian poet; Can recite Shakespeare from his head. The kind of Vampire the girls would take home to meet mum and dad.

Jacob: Regular Teenage boy; likes to fix and ride motorcycles; run through the forest with his friends, with no shirt on, looking for Vampires to kill after turning into a wolf; fight each other if there are no Vampires to kill.

Does your girl prefer polite, well dressed vampires; or rugged protecting Werewolf’s?

If you’re missus is a fan, be sure you know who you’re backing.  Your relationship depends on it!

A review of ‘New Moon’ by a dude

Overall, a good movie. There’s just about as much romance and chick stuff as in ‘Twilight’, but a lot more action.

Motorcycles, Cars, Vampire v Werewolf, Vampire v Vampire, and Werewolf v Werewolf fights. Awesome!

Music – The ‘New Moon’ Soundtrack

Pretty good soundtrack overall… Something for everybody. Here’s the Tracklist…

• 1. Death Cab For Cutie – “Meet Me On The Equinox”
• 2. Band Of Skulls – “Friends”
• 3. Thom Yorke – “Hearing Damage”
• 4. Lykke Li – “Possibility”
• 5. The Killers – “A White Demon Love Song”
• 6. Anya Marina – “Satellite Heart”
• 7. Muse – “I Belong To You (New Moon)”
• 8. Bon Iver and St. Vincent – “Roslyn”
• 9. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club – “Done All Wrong”
• 10. Hurricane Bells – “Monsters”
• 11. Sea Wolf – “The Violet Hour”
• 12. OK Go – “Shooting The Moon”
• 13. Grizzly Bear – “Slow Life”
• 14. Editors – “No Sound But The Wind”
• 15. Alexandre Desplat – “New Moon (The Meadow)”

You can listen to some of it on  MySpace here. Buy a download here, or a CD here.

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